


Remaking memories

by Parachutes



Category: Digimon - All Media Types, Digimon Adventure Zero Two | Digimon Adventure 02
Genre: Angst and Fluff, Ken remembering his emperor time, M/M, they're 14 years old
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-29 00:26:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8468767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parachutes/pseuds/Parachutes
Summary: "‘Ken,’ a voice suddenly called out and Ken froze. ‘You’re crying.’Am I? Ken thought, confused, and he wanted to touch his cheeks to confirm, but before he realized a hand was already on his face, wiping his tears away, and it was not his own. It was warm, strong, and felt like home. Even though Ken already knew what was happening, knew there was no way of escaping this situation, he still hesitated when looking up. When he did, he could see Daisuke had turned on the small light on the nightstand, and he had climbed on his bed and was now sitting next to him on his knees, staring at Ken’s tears he had caught on his fingers."
In which Ken remembers when he was the Digimon emperor. Fortunately, Daisuke is there to chase the darkness away.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo~ Lately, I got into Digimon (yes, I'm super late, I know) and I'm completely in love with these two idiots; they're my newest OTP lol. This was a drabble thingy and it practically wrote itself, but I sorta like it so I decided to post it.   
> I hope you'll enjoy~   
> Oh, I still make a lot of mistakes as English is not my first language, so advice/criticism is always welcome.   
> By the way, I realize this will probably end up not really fitting into the canon timeline, because of tri; as I'm still hoping these idots WILL show up lol. But yeah, I wanted them to be a little bit older, so please forgive me for that.

It was a stormy night. Even with the windows shut tight, You could hear the wind scream, cry, bouncing on the walls, as if it wanted to go inside desperately. It was a little frightening, and somehow Ken felt like he wouldn’t be surprised if the wind really managed to break in. He was watching the windows, even if he couldn’t fully see them in the dark. The raindrops slammed on the roof, full of anger. The weather was very loud indeed, though it was not what had kept Ken awake in the first place. It was past midnight, and he and Daisuke – who had invited himself over again – had decided to go to sleep approximately one hour ago, when they had gotten tired of playing video games. Daisuke was lying on the mattress next to his bed, occupying all of its width, arms and legs spread out wide. The blanket was put sloppily on top of him. As always, he looked ridiculous when asleep. His mouth was open and he was snoring a little – not too much, Daisuke’s snoring was never actually loud in the sense that it was annoying. He was drooling a little bit and mumbled something every now and then. Ken had never actually understood a word of his sleep-talking, but he honestly did it every time he slept over at Ken’s place. Which was… quite often, as a matter of fact. They had been friends for almost three years now. Both fourteen years old, they just started their last year of middle school and since they didn’t go to the same school, they did not see each other every day. That’s why Daisuke came over at least once every two weekends, mostly. He also went to Daisuke’s place a few times before, but he visited Ken most of the time, his reason being that his sister was annoying and it was peaceful and quiet at Ken’s place.

The wind howled and the sound of a thunderbolt crashing in filled the air, making Ken wince a little. Automatically, his gaze went back to his friend, checking if it had woken him, but of course, Daisuke slept through everything. Ken could feel a small smile tickling his lips. Maybe he was still a little scared of admitting it openly, but he always enjoyed it when Daisuke was with him. That boy always dragged him into everything and he tagged along willingly, because, even though it was a little embarrassing to admit that, Daisuke thought him so many things. The warmth of a group of friends around him whom he could always count on, the joy of playing soccer in the pouring rain, the fun in watching movies and playing games together hidden beneath a blanket to escape the winter cold, the feeling of a strong hand in his, supporting but not mocking him, when they went ice skating  together and Ken fell all the time. Daisuke was always next to him, happily, beaming like the sun, and Ken often found himself wondering why he deserved all of this.

Because today, exactly three years ago, he decided to become the Digimon emperor. Ken never forgot dates, and the memories of three years ago were haunting him this night, keeping him awake. He had not yet forgiven himself for what he had done. Luckily, his friends had, which meant he was slowly getting there, step by step. When he had just stopped being the emperor, he saw nightmares every night. Over the years, they had vanished and it was getting better and better. Yesterday had been a fun day, he and Daisuke played games in the arcade and went to eat ramen afterwards, and when they got home they had watched a nice movie and played some more games. (Daisuke never got tired of them, especially when Ken won all the time, making him extremely determined to beat the shit out of him next round… and failing. Ken usually had to let him win in order to stop it.) Really, he hadn’t thought about his emperor time at all, but as soon as they started preparing to go to sleep, Ken remembered.

So here he was, flashes of terrible memories running through his mind. All the digimon he had used, hurt, _murdered_. _Murderer. You’re a murderer._ It was a voice he knew quite well; it was the voice of his darkness, whispering at him. It had become a lot weaker than it was before, but still, it was back today, trying to lure him back into the dark. _You killed them all. You are terrible. You don’t deserve friends._

Ken focussed his gaze on Daisuke, still far away in the land of dreams. And in his mind, he saw Wormmon, sweet, loyal Wormmon… He saw himself shouting at him, kicking him, calling him terrible, terrible names. He couldn’t even remember how many times he had hurt his own digimon partner. And still, the digimon had stuck with him, believed that the darkness would fade, believed in the good inside of him. Ken couldn’t shake the memories away and he closed his eyes shut forcefully, bit his lip until he tasted blood. He wished he could see Wormmon right now, apologize to him even though he had already done it a hundred times before, even though the digimon always answered in the same, cheerful, forgiving way. He wanted to hold him and cuddle him, but the digital world was far, far out of reach and it was simply impossible.

‘Ken,’ a voice suddenly called out and Ken froze. ‘You’re crying.’

_Am I?_ Ken thought, confused, and he wanted to touch his cheeks to confirm, but before he realized a hand was already on his face, wiping his tears away, and it was not his own. It was warm, strong, and felt like home. Even though Ken already knew what was happening, knew there was no way of escaping this situation, he still hesitated when looking up. When he did, he could see Daisuke had turned on the small light on the nightstand, and he had climbed on his bed and was now sitting next to him on his knees, staring at Ken’s tears he had caught on his fingers.

                For a short moment, there was just silence, in which Ken had no idea what to do or what to say. Daisuke seemed distracted too, until he suddenly locked eyes with Ken, making him a little flustered. Embarrassed, he averted his gaze, wiping the remaining tears away, but somehow, his face stayed wet and he wiped, and wiped, but the image of Wormmon and the terrible memories of what he did to him in the past were clouding his vision with more and more tears. He didn’t want Daisuke to see him like this, he didn’t want to rely on his kindness forever, he had to be strong, and he thought he had actually become strong, but today, somehow, it was all crashing down again.

                ‘Hey, Ken,’ Daisuke whispered. Ken could feel him coming closer and he stumbled backwards, until his back touched the side of his bed. ‘Hey,’ Daisuke said, sounding a little irritated now. ‘Don’t run away from me. You’re thinking of stupid things, aren’t you?’

He didn’t really know how to answer that, so he just glanced at his friend carefully, meeting his burning eyes. He shrugged awkwardly, trying to hold back tears but it wasn’t working. Sighing, Daisuke threw himself on him and wrapped his arms around Ken, holding him close.

                His friend was warm, burning like the sun, and he smelled like happiness and like home. Ken didn’t want him to let go, and suddenly he couldn’t stop his tears, holding himself onto Daisuke’s shoulders. Like a movie fast forward, all the memories of three years ago ran through his mind. Greed, hatefulness, arrogance, loneliness, blood, _erase, erase, erase_. Wormmon’s tears, Wormmon’s loyalty. Darkness, endless darkness embracing him completely. Blindness. He was blind in the dark. Wormmon. More hate, more blood, madness. Wormmon… Resistance, suddenly, fights, _burning, burning, burning._ Despair. Endless despair. Shame. He was naked in the darkness. And then, a hand stretched out to him, glowing with light and happiness and love. Too bright, too dazzling. But he took it, anyway.

                ‘It’s okay, just cry. And afterwards, talk to me, okay?’ was whispered in his ear, and Ken tightened his grip. His face buried into Daisuke’s shirt, he absently realized he was getting it wet all over. He could feel Daisuke softly stroking his hair, calming him down.

Taking a deep breath, Ken gently pushed his friend away, facing him. ‘I’m… sorry,’ he mumbled.

                Daisuke grinned. ‘I said it’s okay, idiot. Don’t worry. Now tell me what stupid things you’ve been thinking about?’

‘I was remembering… Everything that happened in the digital world. You know, today, exactly three years ago I entered the digital world for the first time as the emperor. It was the start of everything… I destroyed so many things. I hurt so many digimon… I wish I could see Wormmon right now.’

‘Wormmon has already forgiven you, I actually think he never even blamed you.’

‘That doesn’t make it alright!’ Ken shouted, something he never did and he froze, lowering his gaze.

‘Hey, listen, look at me, okay?’ Daisuke’s hand touched his chin and he was forced to look him in the eyes again. His gaze was determined, like always when he had decided on something. Daisuke always fought for what he believed in until the end, more than anyone in the world. That’s what he loved so much about his friend.

‘It all happened in the past, Ken! You’ve made mistakes, but the important thing is that you realized you were doing wrong and stopped. Either way, you were controlled as well. The only Ken I know is a good person. Leave the emperor behind, he is not you.’

‘It was still me who did all these things, though…’

All of a sudden he was pushed back on the bed by a violent impact, and his forehead hurt like hell. He blinked and as he got up again, confused, and saw Daisuke rubbing his own forehead with a pained expression on his face, he realized. ‘Why’d you head-butt me?’ the words left his lips indignantly, before he could even register them.

‘Because you’re not listening to me!’ Daisuke growled. ‘Owie, I did it wrong, it fucking hurts.’

Ken could only watch Daisuke still rubbing his forehead, messing his already messed up hair even more in the process, the expression on his face both pained and irritated. It was so cute, actually, that Ken tried to hold back a chuckle. It didn’t work.

‘Oi, are you laughing at me?’ Daisuke glared at him, already making a fist and bringing it closer, but Ken saw it coming and was faster, so he caught his friend’s fist before he could land another hit.

However, Daisuke wriggled free easily and jumped in his direction.

                Somehow, Ken was lying on his back now, Daisuke on top of him, holding him down, grinning triumphantly. ‘Gotcha.’

His chest was weird, definitely weird. It hurt a little, but it was not painful. He felt lightheaded but it was not unpleasant. He found himself staring at his friend’s face, noticing how he had gotten older over the past years. His features a bit more manly, but not yet abandoned by a little childishness. Ken sometimes noticed girls staring at him when they went outside together, something his friend would probably love but honestly didn’t realize, as he was such an airhead. Daisuke had changed a bit, but he was still the same. He was still there, by his side, and Ken knew that he always would be right there.

                ‘So, are the gloomy thoughts gone yet, emo guy?’

Ken grimaced. ‘Don’t call me that.’

A grin again played with his friend’s lips. ‘So?’

He was right, though. The memories had left him alone. Of course, he still wished he could see Wormmon, but he had to accept the fact that it just wasn’t possible right now. He knew his sweet partner digimon was alright, and he knew that he would always love Ken no matter what happened. And he also knew he would never ever fall into darkness again.

                ‘Hey, Ken?’

                ‘Hmm?’ Daisuke’s face was distracting, he couldn’t look away. The hands still pinning his arms down, so he couldn’t escape, were warm too, and strong, and like home.

‘What if I give you a different memory to remember on this date? A nice one? So you can forget aaaall about those stupid things?’ The look in his eyes was a little strange, Ken couldn’t quite put his finger on it. The determination so typical for Daisuke was still there, but it was mixed with something else, maybe insecurity, maybe shyness… Ken waited, not fully understanding what his friend was hinting at.

And then, when Daisuke released the grip on his wrists, moved his right hand to stroke his cheek softly, and bent down slowly, it all suddenly made perfect sense. Ken’s heart skipped a beat and he closed his eyes as Daisuke’s lips gently touched his.


End file.
